ESPN: Date Night Part 1

A script I'd love to film if you have $15k lying around

A few weeks ago I participated in a show at the Upright Citizens’ Brigade Theater called sketch cram. While you can read (and watch!) the sketch I pitched that they ended up accepting, below is a draft of a sketch I wrote that they passed on. I wasn’t surprised. In the format of the show, with each sketch not going over four pages by the time the sketch got going it was over. I imagine it as a Key & Peele type runner. With that in mind, with how long the sketch runs, I felt comfortable splitting it in two. Here’s part 1:

INT. FRENCH CAFE - EVENING
A small cafe table with typical American French decor – La Moulin Rouge poster, a Le Chat Noir poster, checkered tablecloths with candles. DAVE (20s) is waiting at a table.

CHARLENE (20s) enters and Dave stands.

DAVE
Charlene? Dave. So nice to meet you.

PULL OUT TO REVEAL:

INT. ESPN BROADCAST BOOTH – CONTINUOUS
We see that this scene is playing out on a giant LED wall behind: A broadcast booth with CHUCK and JEFF, two sports commentators in suits. A…