HONEST TAG LINES FOR TOYOTA ADS
Oh, What a Feeling: It Will Never Die
Toyota has been famous for catchy advertising campaigns like “Oh what a feeling!” or the “Toyotathon”, a portmanteau that has launched a thousand lazy standup jokes (HINT: it’s much easier to run than a marathon. I bet you get it now). But as a proud happy satisfied Toyota owner, none of their ad campaigns really sell the quirks of their vehicles that Toyota owners have come to know and… know.
Here, then, are some honest Toyota advertising taglines that play to the vehicle’s, well let’s call them the vehicle’s strengths:
Zero to 60 in ten seconds…. Sixty to 80 eventually.
The car that the mechanic who services your boss’s Porsche five times a year drives.
A car that will probably outlast the civilization that built it.
Change your oil every 6,000 miles. Or every 25,000 miles. The choice is yours.
Maneuvers like a brick. Accelerates like a brick. Survives car crashes like a brick.
Ignore that noise, it’ll go away in 500 miles.
The upholstery wears away into nothing. The windows quit rolling down. The side panels fall off. The tires go bald. The car still drives.
When you hand it down to your child, they will be disappointed. When they hand it down to your grandchild, they will be doubly-disappointed. But when they hand it down to your great-grandchild, they will repaint it and win an antique car show.
The car that highway patrol looks past when a cherry Mustang in the next lane is going half your speed.
No matter what color you ordered, it comes in Silver.
Drive it home today. Or don’t and buy it used at the same price in five years.
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